What BIs am I obsessing over now? I love the blog community. The BIs are all getting answered over time. And Lainey keeps dropping hints. So I am content for the moment, or I just forgot.
I like the BIs because you get to see the real person behind that US/Star/In Touch lie. I am grateful for this. Plus it gives me something to do besides obsessing about my problems. Plus, I think observing how others succeed or fail based on their merits, and what they are, is an innately prehistoric feminine skill. You don't want to get banished like Tara Reid or Luke Wilson, so please show up for work sober and try to have some respect for yourself and not sleep with anything that walks. Hilton, anyone? It's good advice, really. The breathless way this crazy culture praises fame and material success makes everyone crazy for fame. You have to be really super careful. So it's good to see how those people eventually fall on their rears, and keep yourself humble.
Showing posts with label blind items. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blind items. Show all posts
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Why I'm Obsessed
Why do I get so obsessed? I hate the polished patina that celebs present the world. I hate the way their agents lie to the press about their relationships. I mean, cmon. How long was Beyonce NOT officially in a relationship? And why not? Jay Z is a catch, OK? Weird. And Rihanna? Cmon! And I HATE that Aniston's rep lied so many times. I hate that Jessica Simpson's dad is such a tool and has so much power over her, which is destroying her life. I know the celeb thing is hard, OK? But it's like knowing your eye color, knowing if you're in a relationship. Right? I hate PR machines that string me along. I hate that Lohan's PR said she was drinking "kombucha" a year or so ago. I am addicted to Kombucha. Lohan is NOT a kombucha drinker, OK? Just not! I hate that Lohan is lying to the press now, claiming that she's clean, and that the press can enable her to stay sick. Once upon a time, back in the Bennifer #1 days, I read US Weekly religiously, and I got sick of reading what Benny Medina wanted me to know about her. Her weekly schedule! How early she gets up in the morning! What she cooks for Ben, and how normal she is! Puleeze. JLo was entirely PR manufactured, but in the process, she became oversaturated everywhere and it pissed me off. Don't get me wrong, there's the "glow" and she's charming and she has some innate rhythm/singing thing. But now she's a clotheshorse married to a spider monkey, OK? Boring! And I was bored in 2002, reading about every freaking bowel movement she made. Ugh!
Blind Items, Musings
Not surprised by the Body or Baby BI. Lainey's always ripped Messing's red carpet work to shreds. Thought it was the girl from Felicity. Lainey keeps mentioning her skeletal figure.
SHOCKED to hear about the IV diet. Lohan, Duff, Ashlee, and some others have done this? Nasty.
I don't mind Kidman's botox. Look, it's a competitive business, OK? She's aging and scared. Hell, I'm aging and scared, too. She's worried she won't work again. Freaking out over it. OK, so she lies about her life some. And Urban was tight with Kid Rock before, which is never a good sign. So she went from Cruise to Booze? Sorry, couldn't resist. But I don't mind Nicky's face. It's fake, yes, but it is beautiful. Why doesn't anyone say this? Shame about the nannies, though. Why doesn't she take some time off and relax? Can't rest on the laurels of her oscar? Worried about getting old and never working again if she falls out of the spotlight? Still, it's a shame.
Still can't get over Chase Crawford. Faith, too! Also mulling the Coke for the pain. Look, I'm confused by a woman with such a fine rear end, who's so into her body in all these other ways, taking hormones and cocaine! Just a weird thing to accept. Also trailer visits! But I must say, I wasn't convinced by Jada's kissing photos. It's like watching pandas in a zoo, right? Raising the bar was a shock riddle reveal, too. Was NOT expecting gilbert grape #2. But I saw him in Titanic and elsewhere. I always imagined the smell of sweaty gym socks, and something too fleshy and down-haired in the face. Like, also, some immaturity that can never grow up. Expecting others to do all the work. Just show up and act, kid, and you'll pay our bills. As an adult, it goes sour!
SHOCKED to hear about the IV diet. Lohan, Duff, Ashlee, and some others have done this? Nasty.
I don't mind Kidman's botox. Look, it's a competitive business, OK? She's aging and scared. Hell, I'm aging and scared, too. She's worried she won't work again. Freaking out over it. OK, so she lies about her life some. And Urban was tight with Kid Rock before, which is never a good sign. So she went from Cruise to Booze? Sorry, couldn't resist. But I don't mind Nicky's face. It's fake, yes, but it is beautiful. Why doesn't anyone say this? Shame about the nannies, though. Why doesn't she take some time off and relax? Can't rest on the laurels of her oscar? Worried about getting old and never working again if she falls out of the spotlight? Still, it's a shame.
Still can't get over Chase Crawford. Faith, too! Also mulling the Coke for the pain. Look, I'm confused by a woman with such a fine rear end, who's so into her body in all these other ways, taking hormones and cocaine! Just a weird thing to accept. Also trailer visits! But I must say, I wasn't convinced by Jada's kissing photos. It's like watching pandas in a zoo, right? Raising the bar was a shock riddle reveal, too. Was NOT expecting gilbert grape #2. But I saw him in Titanic and elsewhere. I always imagined the smell of sweaty gym socks, and something too fleshy and down-haired in the face. Like, also, some immaturity that can never grow up. Expecting others to do all the work. Just show up and act, kid, and you'll pay our bills. As an adult, it goes sour!
Blind Items, Personal Experience
I love that P Didsquaddle is on Lainey's dirt list. Love it! Love it because he stood me and my pals up; we waited for him in a recording studio all darned day once and he stood us up. No one stands me up, OK? Forget it! Once that happened, he was on my personal dirt list. P Didsquaddle made my year. I laughed very hard at "I Am King"! I tell ya, I KNOW Obama would show up somewhere if he said he would, and P Diddlysquat is a stupid NUTBAG! No, I don't hold a grudge, sure!
I could swear that the private plane hopping, little people abusing guy was going to be Tom Cruise, or someone like that. Seriously, too. What would it be like to live with Tom Cruise? I actually know a couple of fine former Scientologists, but I dated an active one for 2 weeks and he was a horrorshow. Wouldn't discuss his religion with me, threw me out of the house for meditating (?), and cut me off in that cold way they're taught to do. Also hated my gossip habit and yelled at me for it. Anti-IRS and anti-psychiatry. He needs a shrink, though. Abandoned early by dad. Ripe for exploitation. Nasty! I bet Cruise is constantly getting auditing, and using ALL scientology-speak in the house. Every other phrase is an acronym, right? And he's all about auditing, the bridge, "purif", LRH, etc. Poor man. He really thinks he's saving the planet. He needs to let his demons out, and this is making him a walking Rain Man. Hypermasculine, driven, top-heavy, frightened of the "other", loud, pushy, repetitive, inauthentic, overreaching. What a mess! Wouldn't want him in my house.
I could swear that the private plane hopping, little people abusing guy was going to be Tom Cruise, or someone like that. Seriously, too. What would it be like to live with Tom Cruise? I actually know a couple of fine former Scientologists, but I dated an active one for 2 weeks and he was a horrorshow. Wouldn't discuss his religion with me, threw me out of the house for meditating (?), and cut me off in that cold way they're taught to do. Also hated my gossip habit and yelled at me for it. Anti-IRS and anti-psychiatry. He needs a shrink, though. Abandoned early by dad. Ripe for exploitation. Nasty! I bet Cruise is constantly getting auditing, and using ALL scientology-speak in the house. Every other phrase is an acronym, right? And he's all about auditing, the bridge, "purif", LRH, etc. Poor man. He really thinks he's saving the planet. He needs to let his demons out, and this is making him a walking Rain Man. Hypermasculine, driven, top-heavy, frightened of the "other", loud, pushy, repetitive, inauthentic, overreaching. What a mess! Wouldn't want him in my house.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Blind Item Obsession Defined!
So I'll start with my own goofy story.
To distract myself from my own life last year, I went crazy looking for the answers to 2 Lainey Gossip blind items: Cheap and Crafty; and Mute Stones. Since both appeared to relate to the Oscars, I looked up all the female Oscar winners, and then with mates who also won Oscars, cross-tabulating with the full list of actresses that Lainey eliminated.
So for Cheap and Crafty, since Lainey said the woman in question was married, this is what I came up with:
To distract myself from my own life last year, I went crazy looking for the answers to 2 Lainey Gossip blind items: Cheap and Crafty; and Mute Stones. Since both appeared to relate to the Oscars, I looked up all the female Oscar winners, and then with mates who also won Oscars, cross-tabulating with the full list of actresses that Lainey eliminated.
So for Cheap and Crafty, since Lainey said the woman in question was married, this is what I came up with:
Probably: (maybe too old for stroller/car seat? 5 yrs and 3 yrs) Geena Davis (On September 1, 2001,
Daughter too old. Emma Thompson (In 2003, Thompson married actor Greg Wise (who starred with her in Sense and Sensibility) with whom she has a daughter, Gaia Romilly, born in 1999.)
No kids no man. Marisa Tomei
3 yrs one year. Mira Sorvino (She met actor Christopher Backus—fourteen years her junior—at a friend's charades party in August 2003: "He walked into the kitchen looking for silverware. We saw each other and something made us want to talk to each other more". She told People. They were engaged within a month. On June 11, 2004, they married in a private civil ceremony at a
Not married. Helen Hunt (Hunt was married to actor Hank Azaria from 1999 until 2000. She has been in a relationship with Matthew Carnahan since 2001 and they have a daughter, Makena'lei Gordon Carnahan, born in 2004.)
4 years. Jennifer Connelly (Connelly is a vegan. She is married to well-known English actor Paul Bettany (born 1971), whom she met while working on A Beautiful Mind. The couple's son, Stellan (named after actor Stellan Skarsgård), was born on August 5, 2003. She also has a son, Kai (born 1997), from her relationship with photographer David Dugan.)
Not married. Rachel Weisz (Weisz is engaged to American filmmaker Darren Aronofsky. They have been dating since 2004. They have a son, Henry Chance, born on May 31, 2006 in
11 yrs 6 yrs. Diane Keaton (Diane Keaton is mother of two children: a girl named Dexter (adopted 1996) and a boy named Duke (adopted 2001).
9 years and 3 years. Marcia Gay Harden (Harden is married to Thaddaeus Scheel, with whom she worked on The Spitfire Grill (1996), and the couple have three children: a daughter, Eulala Grace Scheel, and twins Julitta Dee Scheel and Hudson Harden Scheel. She and her husband, Thaddaeus Scheel, have three children: a daughter, Eulala Scheel, born in September 1998, and twins, a boy named Hudson Harden Scheel and a girl named Julitta Dee Harden Scheel, born on 22 April 2004 in
Son adopted in 1994; 13 yrs old. Frances McDormand (McDormand has been in a relationship with director Joel Coen since 1984, and the two married in 1994, as well as adopted a son from Paraguay, Pedro McDormand Coen.)
Not married. Juliette Binoche (Binoche has two children: Raphaël (born on September 2, 1993), whose father is Andre Halle, a professional scuba diver, and Hana (December 16, 1999), whose father is French actor Benoît Magimel, with whom Binoche starred in the 1999 film Children of the Century. Binoche is currently romantically involved with Argentine writer/director Santiago Amigorena.)
No mention of kids. Linda Hunt
Seriously! I actually did this. I know, I know. But if this is my worst habit, I think I'm doing OK. I went on a wild goose chase, though, because Rachel Weisz is engaged, not married! Yeesh.
And Mute Stones was funny; I guessed at Phoebe Cates/Kevin Kline and Rachel Miller/Daniel Day Lewis. Can you imagine? Really it was the race car world for the awards. The Judds don't look the same anymore. I've heard that they treated the youngest like Cinderella, literally. What a shame!
If any of you would like to see the original blind items, they're easy to find on Lainey on a quick search, but I will repost them if you're desperately curious. I'm figuring that, if you're here, you're looking for the answers like I am and know the blind items already! LOL is overused, but what else can I say? LOL! I am so obsessed with gossip that I started my own blog? Craaaazy AND lol!
(P.S. - All info from this posting comes from wikipedia, from separate entries on each actress. Thank you, wikipedia! 97% of what I see makes sense, which is a miracle in a user-written encyclopedia. Also, all Lainey references are from www.laineygossip.com. Thank you for a wild new hobby, Lainey! -n)
Wow! I love the celebrity bloggers!
I am laughing, because I added 4 celebrity blogs to my automatic reader service, and they are ALL top-notch! And I think to myself, I really don't have ad revenue, or insider hints, or any of THAT in my back pocket. So the best I can do is try to solve blind items that are still out in the ether. Or maybe start working on the great American novel, and stop procrastinating.
So, gentle readers, what are you still trying to figure out? Let's have some fun here!
So, gentle readers, what are you still trying to figure out? Let's have some fun here!
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